Everyone wants to be needed by someone,
but when those feelings turn negative, it can lead to feelings of loneliness and anxiety that no one needs us. I'll put it away
There are probably many people who suffer from such anxiety and feelings of loneliness. Their field of
vision is narrowed, so they tend to lose sight of themselves.
There are some things you should know.table of contents
- 1. Not needed by anyone
- 2.You are a necessary person.
- 3.Most people in the world are not needed.
- 4.Knowing is better than needing
- 5. Necessary Not necessary?
- 6. Only the other person feels the need
- 7.Changes dramatically depending on the environment
- 8. Different solutions
- 9. It's okay if you don't need it.
- 10. Just being is enough
- 11. Even if one person disappears
- 12. When you really want something tangible
- 13. Concealment is important
- 14. Even if no one really needed it.
not needed by anyone
“The only time I feel like I'm not needed by anyone is
when I'm conscious of the fact that there's no one next to me.”
Wouldn't it be more appropriate to feel alone and simply feel alone?
・Someone who loves each other
・Someone who understands each other
・Someone who understands
When we feel that "someone" is not next to us, we feel lonely and mistakenly believe that we are not needed.
He's a necessary person.
People who propose counseling or a better lifestyle claim that there is no one in the world who doesn't need counseling.I have also made this statement myself, but there are some things
that don't sit well with me.
I felt that for people who feel like ``no one needs me,'' it might be difficult to get their message across even if I listed plausible reasons and said, ``That's why I need it.''
However, if you think about ``not being needed'' and ``loneliness'' separately, it makes a lot of sense.
Simply being conscious of the fact that there is no one next to you is a completely different matter from whether or not it is necessary.
Most people in the world are not needed
Unfortunately, the majority of people in this world are not needed.
That doesn't mean they're worthless or anything like that.
Because it depends on who you're based on.
If I'm based on myself, I don't need people who send out information and don't get likes, comments, or messages. Don't get me wrong, I don't mean that I want them to do that or that I don't like them, but that they exist
. I don't know anything about it, so there's nothing I can do about it.
please think about it
No matter influential how you are or how important you are in some country, there are many people who don't know about you, so there's no
need for them.
Even if someone knows, it is up to them to decide whether they need it or not.
If you think about it that way, there are many people in the world, but when you think about yourself as a starting point, most of them become people you don't need.
Knowing is better than needing
When deciding what is necessary for you, there is a major premise that you know the other person first.I
feel like you are skipping this important part.
To explain the likes, comments, messages, etc. that I mentioned earlier, by taking such actions, I first learn of your existence.After learning about it, I look at the content and opinions created by that person and find it useful .
If I decide that he is, he will be an indispensable person for me.
There's no way to judge whether something is necessary or unnecessary
if you don't know about it in the first place.If you feel like ``no one needs you,'' first of all, are you someone who is known by people all over the world?
I think when you say "everyone", you mean that it has to be known by people all over the world.
I think many people worry that they are not needed by anyone, but at least I don't know who is worried like that, so I can't say it's necessary or unnecessary. yeah
Even though I don't know it, am I included in "someone" who is "not needed by anyone"?
Necessary Not necessary?
When you feel like you are not needed by anyone, specifically who and in what ways are you not needed?
My best friend recently started running marathons.
However, I don't run marathons, and I don't need a best friend for marathon information.
That doesn't mean that I don't need a best friend, but rather that I need them.
The clerk at a nearby convenience store is necessary when asking for payment,
but it is not necessary as he does not know much more than that.
When you think about it that way, everyone has both necessary and unnecessary parts.
Only the other person feels the need
You can't control other people's emotions.If
you consider this as a major premise, it's up to the other person whether they feel it's necessary or not.It's not just the
content itself, but the timing, so it's a miracle that you can match it.
I create a website, but no matter how carefully I explain to people who don't need a website, they won't need one
. When a website is needed, it will be necessary if you explain it carefully
It's not that you aren't needed by anyone, it's that you just haven't happened to meet someone who needs your skills.
It's a partial set of skills, and I think it's unfair to lump them together as ``no one needs them.''
changes radical depending on the environment
When we have negative feelings such as ``I'm not needed by anyone,'' it's often just because the environment we're in isn't suitable.Probably, the cause is when negative things overlap at home, school, work,
etc. , I think that is often the trigger.
Lately, it may be the same with SNS.
Didn't it all start very small in a small community, where people were hated, ignored, and hurt?
As I continued to repeat those small events in my head and grow, I think that before I knew it, I had developed the delusion that I was no longer needed by anyone.
In addition to not being able to control the other person, timing, etc., things called "attributes" are also relevant.
Even though nothing has changed for you, your environment (attributes) may be different, and you may find yourself being extremely needed or not really needed.
Even if they share the same information, they may be popular on SNS A, but not noticed on SNS B, because their environments (attributes) are different. People who break out simply by switching platforms . There are many people who have changed their
lives by changing schools or jobs.If you
were a doctor and worked at a large hospital with many excellent doctors, even if you felt that you were not really needed, It's just like when the same person goes to an area where there are no doctors, they are in great need.
This does not mean that the person has a problem or is worthless, but it simply means that the environment (attribute) is not suitable for that person.
If you want to get out of that situation, the solution will differ depending on the result you are aiming for.If
the feeling of ``I am not needed by anyone'' is based on loneliness, then you can become independent without depending on ``someone''. The solution is to create what you can do, or actively seek out a community.
If the need arises from a desire to demonstrate one's skills, convey one's charm, or be noticed, then the solution is to research and prioritize the demand rather than oneself.
Even if you vaguely feel that ``I'm not needed by anyone,'' what you should do now will change dramatically depending on the outcome of what should happen.
It's okay if it's not needed
I think that people who feel that they are not needed by anyone feel that they must be needed by someone. I feel like that, but is it really that important?
It may certainly feel good to be needed by someone
, but there is no one who lives by abandoning all food, clothing, and shelter.
・What I am wearing now
・What I am eating now
・Where I am living now
There are people who are involved in everything, and
from their perspective, they are customers and absolutely necessary people.
It's the same with electricity, gas, and water; we just use them unconsciously, but from the perspective of those involved, they are very necessary.
I explained that it is a prerequisite that you know what is "necessary" that you can see, but just by being alive, it is necessary enough in areas that are difficult to see.
No matter how good the service is, it cannot survive without customers.Many
people must use their wits to acquire one customer.It is not only
financial, but also We give a lot of things to someone, such as satisfaction, life, new challenges , and excitement.
It's hard to see, but it's very necessary.
I think it's okay to have more than that, and it's good to know that in a long life, there are times when you feel a visible "necessity" and times when you don't. Isn't it?
just existing is enough
Everyone has experienced babies.
Far from having any skills, they are selfish and cannot feed themselves.
Despite this, they are cherished.
Just by being alive now, someone is already needed for food, clothing, and shelter.
When you are teetering on the edge of life or death due to an unexpected accident or sudden illness, what you want most is to be alive no matter what condition you are in.If you say, ``I want you to be alive'' no matter what condition you are in, I think that ``I want you to stay alive'', even if you say ``I am not needed by anyone.' '
Even if a person feels that they are not being cared for, doctors, nurses, and other people around them will do their best to ensure that their presence continues.
Many people are involved, both directly and indirectly.
The reason why we go to such lengths to make people exist is because there is value in the existence of people.
``Existence'' is something that has hidden value and potential that cannot be compared to things that can be seen, such as being able to do something or having something.
It's worth so much that I don't care if it's needed for something right now.
We already have something of value just by being alive, so shouldn't we think of the rest as just a bonus?
Even if one person disappears
When you're negative feeling, you feel that the world won't change even if one person disappears.The
bottom line is that it won't change.Someone
will soon fill the void, and a new form will emerge.
However, this is true no matter how great
a person is. Even if they hold important positions or have influence, they will always disappear someday.
If you wonder if the world will change drastically, it will return to a similar shape, although there will be some changes.
The world doesn't change much even if one person disappears, which is the same for everyone, and I don't think it's a good idea to associate that with your own negativity.
Even if just one person disappears, the world won't change much, but it is also true that each one of them mixes together, creates and operates the world, and influences someone somewhere.It is only in the present that we can shape the world as it is today
. The only people who can change are the people who are living now.
Even if just one person disappears, the world won't change much, but
the presence of that one person can make a big difference in the world.
When you really want something tangible
It is human nature to want to feel needed.If
you want to feel needed in a visible way rather than in an invisible part, I think it would be a good idea to try something that is easy to do.
I take the time to do things for others rather than myself, such as volunteering and disseminating information by outputting my knowledge. I think it's good to make it visible for yourself.
There are many people who are preoccupied with themselves.People who
can give for others are needed by others.
This is because it is difficult for people to feel that they are needed unless there is someone who can give them something.
That's why, if you feel that you really want something tangible,
you need to make a tangible contribution yourself.
You don't have to do anything difficult.
A little help and small feelings are enough.
As you repeat this, you will become someone who is absolutely necessary for someone.
What's important is concealment
Concealment means accumulating virtue when no one is looking, without asking for anything in return or recognition.Accumulating
virtue means doing good things.
Even if you do something good while thinking about reward and recognition, it will end up being just a calculation.Furthermore,
if you don't receive reward or recognition, you will be disappointed or angry.
Concealment is not at that level.
“Quickly pick up trash in places where no one is looking.”
It's nothing like that, and
I don't get anything in return or recognition from anyone.
However, just by noticing the trash and picking it up, others who pass by the same place can feel more comfortable.
I feel that there is no benefit to me.
When you actually try it,
you will realize that it is surprisingly comfortable.At that point, you will feel comfortable and satisfied with it.Furthermore,
you will feel relaxed.
Such concealment accumulates as luck points.
Even if the present is not the right time, the opposite time will come naturally.
At a time when you would have earned 100,000 yen in extra income if you had done nothing, concealment will be added as points, and it will turn into 1,000,000 yen.I converted it into money to make it easier to understand, but the value in the world
is it's not just about money
There are various things that are valued, such as personal connections, mental stability, and health.
I think it would be a good idea to think of concealment as saving money for "that time" and save it up.
If you want to be needed but keep hiding it, when the time comes for you to be needed by one person, you may become the person needed by 100 people.
People are swayed by the evaluations in front of them and comparisons with others, but such things only happen in a short span of time.Sometimes, for the sake of someone who can't see, even though there is no evaluation or benefit, you can make a point by doing something nice
. Isn't it a good idea to steadily save up money?
Even if no one really needed it
Let's say that you are still suffering from a feeling of not being needed by anyone, which is not just a feeling of loneliness or desire, but something that you can't explain.
There's only one thing I can say
If you found this article and read this far, it means that you are a very important person to me.
There is as much content as there are stars in the world.
Just finding it is difficult, and it is as miraculous as meeting people.
Furthermore, it is rare for people to read this much.
Being read is a driving force for me and a source of sustenance for my life.It
is very necessary.
It's impossible for me not to think that I need you who made this come true.
Even if we discover it 10 or 100 years from now, it won't change.
No matter how much you feel like you are not needed by anyone, please don't forget that you not only exist, but are extremely necessary and precious to me
I hope it helps someone in the world
thank you for reading